Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Where do I go Now But Nowhere?

When you type "calgary webcam" into Google, one of the first things to pop up is a webcam mounted to the side of a building on the south side of 12th ave and 5th street. The bottom corner of the shot frames the canopy of Gerry's Diner (ex-Huskey House).

There are a few things that strike me about the shot. One, there is a building that was obviously built before 1983 across the street. When the crap is someone going to knock it down and build something more shiny? Two, Calgary's been having some crummy weather. Three, the view never changes. I'm not talking about the camera angle, but the whole scene. Cars, concrete, pedestrians. City living.

I've never been away from Calgary for this long before. As much as I hate to say it, I'm getting homesick. That said, the last time I came back to town after an extended leave was total culture shock. The speed of life was too much. I distinctly remember walking down to The Drum to say hi to Rich and being overwhelmed by cars. Just cars.

I don't miss Calgary. Not in the least.

Actually, maybe homesick is the wrong word. I just can't wait to see what comes next. I want to be done with this in order to get on with it. Wish I could be in two places at once. Like I said in a previous post, the promise of the future is tug, tug, tugging. But this moment feels pretty ok too.

Another wish. I wish I could be experiencing this with someone close. As I've said, some of the people I've met will become long lasting friends, but there's a distance. It takes time for people to let their guard down. To figure each other out.

There's a quaint little ice cream shop I can see from the window of my room. The thought of going for ice cream by myself seems depressing.

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